Alleviate
by Forfun100
Summary: "It's a special pediatrics program designed for children who don't want to live in a hospital but need more than Hospice can provide. It's like a home." Oh yes a home, sort of like a retirement home, I guess. A place to live comfortably, until we eventually die. Hospital AU.
1. Chapter 1

_**Authors note:**_

_**Hey there! New story time? Sort of. This will be a biweekly story on the side of my new story to be posted on a weekly basis. My previous story is sadly coming to a close (May get a sequel maybe if I can bring myself to write it. Fingers crossed) Until then this is my 'new story' now that school is starting I will be writing on a weekly basis minus this one. This story gets biweekly because this story takes a lot more research than my weekly one will and I want to write this... right. Oh English puns.**_

_**BIG WARNING: **_**Character D****eath**_**. It is a freaking hospital AU, of course people die. You can be mad at me, but please try to restrain cursing me out.**_

_**Other than that dearest go right ahead! Have fun.**_

I'm going to cut right to the chase here, no bull, no tap dancing around the matter at hand. My name is Piper McLean... Yes, that McLean, and I was born sick. Only they didn't know I was sick until I was about twelve years old. I have been living with a disease called cardiomyopathy. Fancy word huh? Fancy for I'm probably going to die. Probably.

Let's break this down a bit. Cardiomyopathy is a heart condition that focuses on the muscles. Now, as you probably know, your heart is entirely composed of muscle so this is already bad news. There are four main ways this disease can affect someone, A the muscles thicken, B the muscles grow causing the heart to become enlarged, C the muscles become like a fatty tissue as apposed to a muscle like it's supposed to be, or D the muscles harden like a shell. In most cases it's a combination of two or three.

In my case, I have an enlarged heart that is hardening. Which means; instead of my fist being the same size as my heart (like it's supposed to be) it's, roughly, the size of a fully grown adult male. And yes, that is a very bad thing. You're a smart kid, you probably know that. There are a few extra problems on top of this. One, hard heart means it's nearly impossible for my heart to beat on its own. Two, heavy heart crushes lung sitting right underneath it.

Life pretty much sucks. Mostly because I know they could have prevented this. Well, I mean, there is no cure, but had they known when I was born how sick I am they could have given me a drug that slows the condition down.

Anyway, that isn't the point, the point is I'm sick. I have been for a while now. But I haven't been probably dying until today.

Over these past three years I've been going to the doctor once every month to check on my condition. Only today...

I entered the hospital waiting room by myself. My hands shoved deep in my jacket pockets, head down, earbuds with music still narrating my journey here. I see the nurse, a familiar face to me, smile.

"Hey, Piper." She greets, handing me the sign in sheet.

"Hey, Juniper." I say signing my name, "How goes it?"

"Alright." She nods taking the clipboard back, "The doctor should be ready for you, I'll go see."

"Oh, the doctor huh? He piss you off?"

She rolls her eyes as she walks away. Juniper is dating my physician, Dr. Underwood. He's the head pediatrician at this hospital, despite the fact that he's the biggest dork alive. Or maybe that's a requirement, most of the pediatricians I've met are pretty ridiculous.

I take a seat and flip through my music, but before I can decide on a song, Juniper is back.

"He's ready for you."

"Cool." I nod standing up. I hesitate for hardly a second as my blood flow readjusts to my standing. A trait I've simply become accustomed to over these years of my being sick. You get used to this kind of stuff.

Juniper leads me into Dr. Underwood's exam room, "Oh, it's you." He teases with a dorky smile.

"Sorry, Doc. Know you've got more important stuff to do than attend to me, but." I shrug taking a seat on the paper covered chair.

"You're no trouble." He laughs taking down some notes, "How've we been?" He asks, as Juniper begins my examination.

"Well, I'm still walking, talking, functioning as a basic human being. That's good."

"Very good." He agrees, "How's school?"

"Gross."

"So, your mentality is still intact." He notes, "Made any new friends?"

"What do you mean by new? I've never had friends." I laugh.

"You're such a loving person, I thought you'd finally allow someone to see it. You've started High School correct?"

"Yup. Worst decision of my life." I inform him.

"Spot on. You've been taking your medication regularly?"

"Yes, sir."

"And you haven't missed an appointment."

"That's because you're my best friend, Doc."

"I'm so flattered." He chuckles, "Okay now, my turn for tests." He says as Juniper hands him the clip board with her evaluations.

"So, are you really in the dog house?" I ask. Causing the two of them to laugh.

"No, we're just professionals." He informs me. rolling his little stool over to the exam chair, "Right, honey?"

"Yes, dear." Juniper chuckles.

"Alright you know what to do." He says beginning his evaluation.

"So, no boyfriend?" Juniper asks me.

"No, ma'am." I tell her.

"I wonder why not. A pretty girl like you?" Yeah, because everyone wants to date the school freak. Who just so happens to be so sick she can't even take gym.

"I'm not pretty. I'm more of a silent terror." I tell her with a teasing smile.

"Oh, so you're silent at school, huh? Why not here?" She teases back.

"Breathe in." Dr. Underwood requests placing his cold stethoscope on my back.

"I'm sure the boys are all just intimidated by you. I know I am." I roll my eyes at her comment.

"Out." He says, I let the air deflate out of my chest. He continues to evaluate me before asking any questions, "Have you had any new symptoms?" He asks rolling back to his desk.

"Not really." I say thinking back through these weeks since my last visit.

"Not really?" He asks.

"Well, I mean, stairs have gotten a little worse." I think back to my school days when I get to class panting from having to climb the stairs.

"A little worse?"

"Like it's harder for me to catch my breath."

He takes note of that, "Anything else?"

"I guess I've been more tired lately. But that's because of school, probably." He writes it down anyway.

"Any trouble with school?"

"With classes? No. With getting around? Only the stairs thing." I answer.

"Alright, now for the tests."

"Fun." I chuckle as we walk out of the exam room so I can get other tests done. Once my blood is drawn and my insides have had their selfie time, I get to hang out with Juniper and the other nurses, until my results come in.

They gossip about the trauma nurses, apparently Brittany is pregnant and doesn't know who the father is. It's not at all weird for me to be around these people, they're honestly the only friends I have. Sad? A bit. But their lives really are as dramatic as Grey's Anatomy says. It's entertaining to me.

After I found out I was sick, I stopped socializing with kids my age. Not that I did much socializing to begin with, but I suddenly didn't have anything in common with them. Which sounds cliché but there isn't much you can do about the truth, no matter how stereotypical it can be.

"Piper." Dr. Underwood walks over to the nurses station, "We have your results back."

Juniper and I stand up, following Dr. Underwood into his office.

I love his office, because his office is a place for teenage boys. He's got a basketball hoop for crying out loud. You'd almost never guess that he knows every word to every Hillary Duff's So Yesterday, but he does. It's not at all relevant to this story, but I thought you should know.

He sits on the edge of his desk as he pulls out the different papers from my tests. He knows I hate it when he beats around the bush. He wants to get right down to it.

"Your blood count was especially low today, which was why we did the extra chest ultrasound." He puts my scans on the back light, "Your CT scan showed us that your heart has not grown much since your last appointment, which would be a good thing, but that's also why we're glad we did the extra tests."

He pulls out another paper, reads it, and then says, "Your heart has hardened considerably since we last checked. Which is the reason for your low blood count. It's getting harder for your heart to pump blood on its own. We're going to need to get in contact with your dad."

Three years ago I would have scoffed and said, "Good luck." But he's gotten better about taking calls from Dr. Underwood.

"There's also something else." He pulls out the ultrasound images, "You see this?" He outlines a darker part of the image. I nod, "That would be your lung. You see how it looks like it's being pushed up?" I don't really, but I nod, " What's going on here is like what happens when you push on a balloon and it inflates around whatever is constricting it. In this case, your heart is weighing down on your lung. Hence why you've been experiencing shortness of breath.

"Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

"That I'm sicker than we thought."

He nods, "We can help regulate your heart beat with a pacemaker which is what I need to get in contact with your father about. The other thing is, we can't wait any longer to put you on the donor list. You need a new heart."

And that's what I meant by, I'm probably dying. Because, I don't know if you know this, but donors aren't easy to find. Especially when you need a heart for a teenage girl. I know that, Juniper knows that, and Dr. Underwood knows that.

"Could you call your dad?" He asks.

I pull out my phone and dial his number, "Tristan McLean's phone." His water boy answers, "Who is this?"

"Piper, you know, his kid?" I always have hated his water boys.

"What do you need?"

"I need to talk to him."

"He's a very busy man."

"Don't you think I know that? Can you tell him I need to talk to him please?"

He sighs, "They're in the middle of a scene."

"I can wait, but not for long." I tell him.

After a few minutes pass I hear the phone switch hands, "Pipes?"

"Hi dad." I greet, "Dr. Underwood needs you to come down here."

"What for?"

I put the phone to my chest, "What do I tell him?" I ask Doc.

"Tell him... Uh... Forms. I need him to sign forms! Yeah that's it." God, my doctor is a dork.

"He needs you to sign some forms."

"Can't he fax them over?"

"Uh... Fax?" I ask Doc.

"Tell him you need him here."

"Dr. Underwood says I need you here."

"I get out for a lunch break in thirty minutes. Can he wait?"

"Thirty minutes?" Doc gives me a thumbs up, "We can wait."

"Okay, see you then."

"Bye." We hang up, "Don't you love my dad?" I ask.

"Of course we do." Doc chuckles, "He gives me a good paycheck."

"And me. He gave you me." I smirk.

"Well..." He gives me a look.

"You adore me." I tell him.

"Duh, would have gotten rid of you ages ago if I didn't." He informs me. He pulls out the small plastic basketball and tosses it to me, "Let's see if you've improved."

"I likely have. You know, with all of my training."

For the next thirty minutes the three of us toss the plastic basketball at the hoop, only getting a point every twenty shots or so. We repeat the cycle for the thirty minutes after that, and the thirty minutes after that.

My dad shows up almost two hours later.

"Sorry, I'm late, Doctor. I got held up at work." He says walking into the room. He kisses the top of my head before sitting beside me.

"No worries." Dr. Underwood slips the plastic basketball into the drawer of his desk.

"So, where are those forms?" He asks.

"Well, we actually need to talk about-"

"Honestly, Doctor, I trust you with my daughter's life. I believe you're doing what's right for her. I'll sign whatever you need." He's in a hurry, as usual.

"Sir, I think your daughter should be pulled out of school." He says bluntly.

"What for?" Dad asks.

"Because, your daughter's condition has gotten worse. We called you here so I could tell you that her heart can hardly beat on it's own. We'll have to give her a pacemaker in order to help her heart actually beat. Which is the procedure I need you to sign off on. But the pacemaker will only do so much. She needs to be placed on the donor list for a new heart, because the one she has now, is cutting off her lung. She needs to be taken out of school because she needs constant care."

My dad's face fills with confusion he looks at me. His eyes say, but you look healthy to me.

"Wait," I speak up, "I have to live in a hospital then?"

"Not necessarily." He says, "You will have a few options on how you wish to go about this."

"My kid is sick?" Dad asks, "Like, terminally sick?"

"If we don't get her on the donor list, yes she would be considered terminal." He says it like he doesn't want to. Like he wishes it weren't true.

"But... Pipes." He can't figure it out. He can't figure me out.

"So, Doc. How long do we have then?" I ask.

"Hard to say." He answers truthfully, "But we have other matters to discuss. The procedure, getting her on the list, where we are going to have her live."

I nod to him.

"I'll sign off on the procedure, and getting her on the list." Dad says, "But... Where will she live? I don't even know where to start."

"Like I said, you have a few options." Dr. Underwood laces his fingers together like a real professional would do, "She could live in your home, sign up for Hospice care. We could admit her to this hospital, here she'd be under constant supervision." He pauses before he seems to have a light bulb moment, "Or," He rummages through his drawers, "Juniper could you get me the pamphlet for Camp?"

Juniper nods, walking out of the room.

"Camp?" Dad asks.

"Yes sir, it's one of the newest facilities our hospital has. It was built about seven years ago. One of our residents runs a sort of Hospice unit, out of his home." Juniper returns with the pamphlet, "Yes, Camp Jupiter." He hands it to my dad, "It's a special pediatrics program designed for children who don't want to live in a hospital, but need more than Hospice can provide. It's like a home."

"A home?"

"Yes, it's an excellent program. The house is just two blocks away from here, so it's incredibly close to the hospital. Their care, is excellent. There is a max amount of patients that can live there, I believe it's ten. You can be assured she'll get the attention and care she'll need."

My dad flips through the pamphlet, "Do you think this would be the best option for her?"

"I think it'd be best for you both." Doc says, "Let's be honest Mr. McLean, having a child on Hospice care, requires a very attentive parent in the child's life. And with your work, you couldn't do that for her, not to mention the absence of her mother.

"And Piper, I don't think you want to live in a hospital. You're also not at the point where living in a hospital is necessary. This option would be the best for the both of you. In my opinion."

I look at the pamphlet's front photo. A large house, with well kept lawns, a house that almost looks straight out of a Home and Garden magazine.

"Pipes?" Dad asks me, "What do you think?"

"I think I don't want to live in a hospital." I say. I think you're too busy for me. To busy to take care of your sick child, but I'd never say it to him, "And Hospice care isn't too appealing either."

"Okay." He says, "Then yes. We'd like to look more into this." He hands the pamphlet back to Dr. Underwood.

"Juniper, call Chiron to see if he has time for me today."

"He always does." Juniper smiles walking out of the office.

"Now, we need you to sign these forms." He plops a dictionaries worth of papers in front of my dad, "These are the papers for the donor list, and the procedure. We'll see if the director has time to meet with you today on her living arrangement."

Dad gets to signing right away as Dr. Underwood talks us through the procedure. When Juniper returns my dad finishes signing the stack of contracts.

"He says he's free for the afternoon, he'd be willing to give you the tour if you'd like, Mr. McLean."

"What time?" My dad asks. He has to get back to work.

"Right now, if you're ready." Juniper smiles softly.

"That'd be best." My dad stands up.

"Uh, sir." Dr. Underwood stands up, "I'll be taking your daughter in for her procedure right now. Do you want to wait?"

He doesn't want to. He has more important things to do, "Pipes, do you need me to stay?"

I shake my head, "I'll be fine."

"Okay." He nods following Juniper out of the office.

"That man is all work and no play." Dr. Underwood says.

"No kidding." I agree standing up, "So, pacemaker time?" I smirk.

"Come with me." Doc returns the smile. I'm prepped for the procedure and in no time at all I'm waking up from my surgery. I don't quiet know what I was expecting when I woke up, but it wasn't to be greeted by two strange men.

One older, with kinder eyes. The other, colder, seeming to be more task driven as he takes down some kind of notes.

I give the men a look of confusion as Doc walks into my room, "You're awake, congratulations."

"Thanks?" I can hear the grogginess of my voice leak into the air.

"Piper, this is Chiron," He gestures to the kind looking man, "And Dr. D. The residents in charge of Camp Jupiter."

"It's nice to meet you, Piper." Chiron says to me. I nod tiredly, "Your dad signed you off to live in our facility. We're very excited to have you."

I doubt that, just because I doubt sick kids can be can be excited about anything, "Okay." I say with no other polite response coming to mind.

"Your dad has packed your things already and brought them to our facility. You're all moved in except for yourself."

"Uh... Cool?" I want to wake up more.

"And you'll be moving in as soon as I get your discharge papers in order." Doc informs me. I don't respond, I wait for them to say something.

After an awkward pause Chiron says, "Your roommate is excited to meet you. Her name is Annabeth and she's been with us since we opened. She'll be helping you get settled in." I wonder what's wrong with her, if she's been there since they opened. I sincerely hope she's hard to get along with, I hope she's not actually excited to meet me. I mean, I'm kind of terminal, and maybe she is too. But who wants to have friends when you know we're going to die?

After I wake up a bit more, I'm discharged from the hospital, and taken to my new home via hospital van. It's not even dark out, it's only six o'clock. I'm still thoroughly exhausted besides that, however.

"We're here." Chiron announces. as we pull into the driveway. Much to my surprise, the house looks exactly like it did in the pamphlet. Why am I shocked? I don't know, I don't usually expect things to be exactly what they seem. Chiron helps me out of the van and leads me up to the house, "It's dinner time, everyone will be in the dinning room. You don't have to eat tonight, if you're too tired. But we'd like you to meet everyone."

I don't respond as we walk into the house. Chiron directs me to the dinning room. The first thing I notice is that it's obnoxiously loud. Filled with ringing laughter and even louder comebacks. I feel like I'm walking into a school cafeteria.

Once I find myself standing in the dinning room, the teens around the table fall silent. I have always hated attention. Especially now, I feel incredibly uncomfortable.

"Everyone. This is Piper. Our new resident. I expect you all to make her feel welcome." He turns to me, "Are you hungry? You can take a seat and eat with the rest of them, if you are."

I have to think for a moment. I haven't eaten since breakfast at eight o'clock this morning, "Yeah." I mumble.

"Okay, you can go sit next to Annabeth, right at the end there." Chiron directs me to the other end of the table where a girl with a mop head of messy blonde curls sits.

I take a seat beside her, "Hi." She says, "I'm Annabeth, which, yeah, Chiron just told you. I'm your roommate."

"Hi." I give her a small smile, "Piper." I'm given a small plate and some utensils.

"Hey guys, pass some food down here, will ya?" Annabeth says.

"I'll think about it." An impish looking boy smirks.

"Don't be like that, Leo." Annabeth says, "We have to be nice remember?"

Leo rolls his eyes, "Fine." He passes down a bowel full of Mac and Cheese. I scoop a bit on to my plate.

"Does this mean I can sleep in your bed now?" The boy beside Annabeth asks.

"Percy!" Annabeth laughs. My eyes widen considerably, "No!"

"What? Now that they've pushed the beds back-"

"Stop it!" I look down at my food and start eating a bit quicker.

"It's a valid question." He protests.

"In what world?" She demands.

"This one. Duh." I'm so happy I get full quickly. Does anesthesia do that? Cause I'm full and falling asleep, and I'm so glad because I assume they want to ask me questions that I don't feel like answering.

"Piper? It's Piper right?"

"Hm?" I look up from my empty plate that had almost mesmerized me into sleeping.

"I'm Percy, the coolest kid you will ever meet." The dark haired guy beside Annabeth introduces himself, "And Annabeth's boyfriend. She'll probably spend a lot of time talking about me."

"Stop it." She scolds him. I feel myself nodding off again.

"What'd they do, drug you before bringing you over here?" Percy asks.

"Yeah." I think I nod, but I probably just sound high.

"I'll take you to our room. You can get some rest. I'm sure you've had a long day." I slowly stand up, let my sight readjust to my new position, and follow Annabeth out of the dinning room, "I'll help you out tomorrow." She leads me down a long stretch of hallway, "We haven't had a new resident in awhile. But don't worry, we're a good group. We're very accepting of each other."

"Cool." I slur tiredly.

"Are you okay?" Annabeth turns to look at me.

"Yeah, I just... Had a procedure done like... Two, maybe three hours ago?"

"Wow, and they just brought you over here?"

"Yeah." I feel a bit dizzy as she opens the door to our room.

"What was the procedure?" She asks flipping on a blinding light. The room is well sized. Two twin sized beds, two dressers, and a closet fit nice and evenly. The room looks lived in, thankfully. Annabeth's bed has a knitted quilt on it, books precariously perched on the edge of her dresser, and pictures scattering the walls of her side of the room.

"Pacemaker." I say sitting down on my bed. It's not the most comfortable thing I've ever felt, but it's better than the hospital bed I had been in an hour ago. Even on that thing, though, I'd still sleep like a baby, at this point.

"Ah, you're a heart kid."

"Yeah, I guess." I say, feeling my drowsiness intensify with each passing second.

"Well, we can talk more in the morning, you seem really worn out. Your clothes are in the drawer, bathroom is at the end of the hall last door on the left." I nod, "You want me to turn off the light?"

"Sure." I mutter, slipping off my shoes.

"Night, Piper."

"Night." The moment the door is closed behind her I fall onto the bed. Not even bothering to pull up a blanket I only have enough consciousness to pull my knees to my chest before I fall asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

I wake up, when I presume we're supposed to. Eight. But Annabeth is still laying unconscious in her bed. So, I pull down the sheets of my bed and curl up under them. The sheets are surprisingly warm, and it doesn't take long for me to fall back to sleep.

Thirty minutes later I wake up again, to the sound of knocking. Annabeth groans, "Huh?"

"Rise and shine princess." The voice is familiar, but I can't place it... And why am I in jeans?

"Go away." Annabeth groans.

"No."

"Annabeth?" I ask, "Where are my clothes?"

Annabeth turns back in her bed to look at me, "Oh, the dresser's yours."

I cautiously check the different drawers, looking for anything to put on, beside my now crumpled clothes that smell of yesterday and sweat.

"Shower?" I ask her.

"Oh, yeah." Annabeth sighs getting up, "Sorry, I'm not much of a morning person."

"Don't worry about it." I tell her as she leads me into the bathroom. She shows me how to work the shower and then leaves me to wash off. I'm glad I have this chance to clean myself. Because, honestly? I felt disgusting waking up this morning.

As I take off my shirt I look down to see a rise in my skin, where my pacemaker now sits. It's odd to see it there. Odd to know my heart now relies on the Energizer bunny to keep it going.

After a quick shower I walk back into mine and Annabeth's room, not knowing where else to go.

Annabeth is still in her pajama's reading a book, "Hey." She looks up and smiles at me, "Ready for breakfast?"

"Sure." I half smile.

She stands up, "I'll show you around after. Introduce you to everyone, blah, blah, blah." She starts heading off in the direction of the dinning room, "Everyone's rooms are in this hall, the only thing you need to know is where the bathroom is. Two doors down from our room." I nod as we enter the dinning room, "Morning all." Annabeth takes her seat beside Percy. I take the seat beside her. We've been served a choice of waffles or cereal. I take a still warm waffle off of the stack as the others start to talk.

"Oh, hey sunshine. Good to see you conscious." The impish one smirks. I'm not sure how to respond so I shove a too big bite of waffle down my throat.

"No nicknames, Leo." Right, that's his name. Leo, "Call her Piper."

Leo sighs, "You're such a buzz kill, Annabeth." Not all of the seats are filled. Out of the ten chairs sat around the table, only Annabeth, Percy, Leo, two others, and I are present.

"Where is everyone?" Annabeth asks for me.

The girl at the end of the table with dark hair twisted into a braid looks up from her bowl of cereal, "Well... Bianca was transferred last night."

"Oh no." Annabeth says, "Poor, Nico."

"She's conscious right now, but she's not doing so well."

"Are you guys gonna go see her?" Annabeth asks.

"I am. When I'm done eating." The girl says, "Leo, you coming?"

"Sure."

"Me too." The guy beside her says.

"Because you love Hazel." She teases him.

"Shut it." He mutters into his cereal.

"Looks like you and the newbie get the house all to yourself, baby." Percy leans over to give Annabeth a syrupy kiss.

"Hey!" She laughs as he leaves the dinning room.

"We're gonna go, see you and dinner?" The girl stands up.

"Yeah," Annabeth waves as the rest of them leave, "Well, I guess it's just you, me, and Dr. D." She chuckles. We finish our meals before Annabeth takes me through the house, showing me the ins and outs of the place.

When we get back to the living room we both plop down on the same couch, "Now," She says pulling out an album from one of the side tables, "Here's everyone."

When I open the cover I see pictures of everyone who lives here gathered around a Christmas tree.

"We get Chiron a new one every year." Annabeth explains, "Since I can't introduce you to everyone, this'll do for now."

We turn the page, "That's me." She points to the picture of herself, "I've been here for a long time. Seven years. And now for the million dollar question, what's wrong with me?" She turns a little bit closer to me, "I have an inoperable brain tumor. they're hoping to shrink it down to a point where I can get it removed. But don't worry, I don't have cancer. None of us do actually. That's the nice thing about Camp. No Chemo. No Radiation. And we're all happy campers." She jokes. I smile a little.

"They have a separate house for Cancer kids. All of us are just sick. It pisses me off actually, that people think the only illness in the world is Cancer. Seriously. You have no clue how many times teachers used to ask me if I had cancer."

"I know what you mean." I agree with her, "Nobody gets it."

"How long have you been sick?"

"Technically? All my life. How long I've known, is about three years."

"Yikes. How'd you find out?"

"If you want me to be honest. I just thought I was super out of shape."

She laughs, "Really?"

"Yeah, because I had trouble running and stuff in gym. I found out because when I did the rope climb I blacked out, because I stopped breathing."

"Wait, I thought you had heart problems."

"I do. Cardiomyopathy."

"I don't know what that is." She chuckles.

"It's complicated, but my heart is enlarged and hardening. My heart's kind of crushing my lung."

"Oh wow. That's weird."

I shrug, "It's not the weirdest disease out there."

"You're right, but still. Do people make fun of you for having a hard heart?" She smirks.

"No one knew. I mean, my dad, and my teachers, but I didn't talk to other students much."

She nods, "I haven't talked to someone who isn't sick in years."

"Well, sick people can be fun." I smile at her, "My doctor tells me I'm a riot."

"Who's your doctor?"

"Dr. Underwood."

"Oh I love him." Annabeth smiles, "I haven't seen him in awhile."

"That's a good thing." We both laugh, "Who's next?"

I turn the page to see Percy's smiling face. I wonder how I happened to miss the oxygen tubes stuck in his nose.

"Oh, that's Percy." Annabeth smiles at the picture, "He's been here for four years now? Five maybe. I'm not so sure actually. Well, we like to say he's swimming in his own lungs. We do it lovingly, of course, because we know how much he actually loves swimming, but he has this condition in his lungs that's actually quiet disgusting.

"See, he has these puss filled... Uhg it's so gross sorry. Puss filled lumps in his lungs and every now and then, they burst. It's nasty." She looks back at the picture, "But he's the light of this place. We all love him even when we don't want to."

The next page has two people a boy and a girl.

"These are our siblings." Annabeth says, "Nico and Bianca. You heard that Bianca's in the hospital right now. They both have an inherited disease that I honestly, just don't understand. Nico's better than Bianca though. I feel bad for the poor kid, he's probably going to watch his sister die in the next few days."

She shakes her head as I turn the page, "Alright you remember the girl with the braid at breakfast this morning?"

"Yeah, that's her?" I guess.

"Yep. That's Reyna, right now she's functioning with failing kidneys, liver, and pancreas. Hopefully she'll get a liver later this week, that'd make her life easier."

"Holy crap." I chuckle nervously.

"Oh, she's not even the one with everything wrong with her. She's such a trooper about it too. She's really good at hiding the pain, which is both good and bad. You know?"

I nod turning the page.

"That's Frank he's a nice kid." She points to the picture, "His organs are literally being digested."

"What?" I ask.

"His organs are being digested."

"Oh my god."

"He's cute though, because he's constantly talking about how he's always hungry even though he shouldn't be." Annabeth chuckles, "I freaking love this kid. Well, I actually love everyone here, but that's beside the point."

I turn the page, "I lied." She says, "I don't like him." It's the impish boy who's name is Leo, "I kid, I adore him, no matter how much he pisses me off."

"Leo, right?"

"Yeah,"

"What's wrong with him?" I ask.

"I don't know. He's just always got a fever, and he's nervous all the time. I think right now he's undiagnosed. But they're still giving him some kind of medicine. I don't know much about that kid. Really, I don't."

On the next page a particularly beautiful girl smiles gratefully.

"This is Hazel." Annabeth says, "Hazel's died so many times we're always asking her when she's gonna stay there. Her problem is the intestines, holes everywhere with her. Do you know how hard it is to find small and large intestines? Very."

"I'll bet." I agree.

"She's a real sweetheart. She also happens to be Nico and Bianca's half sister. I think they share a dad. You'd have to ask them sometime for details, because I don't exactly get it. She's darling and I'm sure you'll get along just fine."

We hear the front door open and the sound of light conversation enters the air.

"It was so cool!" I hear a young boy smile brightly.

"Yes it was, now stop jumping, you'll rip your stitches open."

"I only have, four." The younger complains as they walk into the living room. The younger boy, if I recall correctly, is Nico. His eyes look dark with sleep deprivation, but he looks excited. The other, much taller boy... I don't know. Maybe like... Leo? Not wait, Leo's the elfish one. Crap. Who's this one?

"Hey Annabeth." The older boy greets.

"Annabeth, look!" Nico lifts his shirt to shower her four stitch marks, "I had an awake surgery." He tells her proudly.

"That cool, Nico." She smiles sympathetically.

"Dude, high five." I smile at him. Kid's got balls to have an awake surgery. I couldn't do that. He high five's me enthusiastically.

"Who are you?" He asks after.

"Piper. The new girl." I tell him.

"Oh, Piper, this is Sparky-"

"My name's not Sparky." He shakes his head.

"We call him Sparky because he's always getting shocked back to life. Doctors still don't know exactly what's wrong with him yet."

"Don't make me sound more interesting than I am, Annabeth." Sparky shakes his head, "I have a nervous system disorder. I'm waiting for the doctors to finish all their research, before the experimental surgery." He explains to me.

"Scary."

"Not as scary as going to sleep every night wondering if you're even going to wake up." He tells me.

I look down to where Nico is now sitting. On the floor in front of the coffee table.

"You play Mythomagic?" I ask him.

He looks at me with a new found sense of delight, "You play?"

I chuckle, "Course."

"You want to play with me!?" He almost jumps with excitement.

"Sure. I'll go get my deck." I tell him standing up to walk back to my room. The kid actually follows me and starts spouting stats about each character.

I smile as I walk him into my room. Until I realize I have no idea where my deck is. I was not the one who moved me in, so... Yeah.

I start rummaging through my drawers until I, by some kind of luck, stumble upon them.

"You ready?" I ask.

"Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!" He jumps up and down before setting up his deck.

We play a quick round, with a tie mind you, until we're interrupted by Sparky and Annabeth.

"Hey kiddo's. Lunch time." Annabeth smirks, "Grilled cheese."

Nico jumps up in excitement. Sparky holds out his hands, "Hey be careful." Nico rushes past him.

"Food is something to run for." I chuckle standing up.

"Indeed." Annabeth chuckles, "Nico gets excited, at pretty much anything."

"How cute." I chuckle.

"Yeah, until you realize he's gonna hurt someone. Or himself." Sparky smirks.

The three of us walk to the dinning room where we all slip into easy conversation.

"So, Piper, where did you go to school?" Annabeth asks.

"I went to Goode, in the north part of town." I explain.

"My sister went there." Sparky says, "She was a volleyball player."

"Cool." I nod, "I never played sports."

"Me neither." Annabeth agrees.

"I used to play. I was in the peewee football league."

"Awe, you're adorable Sparky." Annabeth teases him.

"Shut your face." He laughs.

"Percy's step dad teaches at Goode. English. Did you know him?" Annabeth asks.

"Ah... Well, my English teacher was Mr. Blofis."

"That's him." Annabeth smiles.

"I liked him. Hated the class, but liked him."

"Do you have a lot of friends who'll be visiting?"

"Oh, yeah, tons. They're called nurses." Sparky snorts at my remark.

"That sounds about right." Annabeth chuckles.

I guess I don't need to bore you with idle chat. Annabeth, Sparky, Nico, and I grow fond of each other in the time that the others are away.

And even when the others come home from their visit, I learn a little about each of them.

Like, Reyna, for instance, she used to live in DC, her mom is deployed overseas right now. Hazel and I have the same interest in TV shows, because no matter what you say America's next top model is a good freaking show. Leo is going to be my new best friend, I can already tell. Frank is a big old sweetheart, who is terrible at playing cards, but he tries. Percy's an obnoxious annoying idiot, that I can't help but like, it's weird, okay?

After dinner, Annabeth pulls the girls all out to the back yard, so the boys can do something inside, whatever it is boys do I guess.

The backyard, I'm not so sure I've mentioned, is rather small only occupied by grass and a few lawn chairs.

Reyna lays on her back in the middle of lawn, while Hazel grabs a chair and strategically places it over Reyna.

"You suck." Reyna sighs, wiggling herself out of Hazel's chair.

"You're laying out." Hazel chuckles.

Annabeth sits next to Reyna, pulling Reyna's braid so her head lays in Annabeth lap.

"Why are you both so aggressive today?" Reyna complains as I sit next to Hazel's chair. Hazel glances down at me before placing a hand on my head. Slowly, she starts stroking my hair back.

"Because I love you." Annabeth says.

"Love me in a gentle way next time." Reyna sighs.

"Mkay."

"Piper, your hair is really freaking soft." Hazel says, "Can I braid it?"

"Go for it." I smile at her moving in front of her to let her braid my hair.

"So, Piper, how'd you get here?" Reyna asks.

"By van." I smirk.

"How funny. No seriously. What's your sick kid sob story?"

"Well, it's not really a sob story. I was diagnosed at age twelve with my heart condition. They told me I could stay off the donor list for a while, because at the time it wasn't necessary. But yesterday they found that I've progressed too far to avoid it anymore. So, they gave me a pacemaker, and sent me here. No such sob story." I chuckle.

"Lucky girl." Hazel laughs with me.

"The rest of you all have sob stories?" I ask.

"Duh." Annabeth says, "Brain tumor. My entire family thought I had cancer, half of them still think I do have cancer."

"Like last Christmas when your Uncle Aidan asked us how Chemo was?" Reyna chuckles.

"That was the worst!" Annabeth hides her face.

"What about you Reyna? Your mom's entire regiment coming to the Christmas party half drunk?" Hazel teases.

"One time!" Reyna laughs, "One time, and they won't let it go."

"Kind of like how we'll never let go Hazel's mom bringing those super morbid ornaments to put on the tree?" Annabeth brings up.

"Please stop." Hazel laughs.

"Those don't sound much like sob stories." I laugh with them.

"Well, my sob story is that I'd been toted around all over the world, from hospital to hospital, without any cure until I got here." Reyna says, "My mom dropped me off and went to war when she found out about this place. But then again so did Franks parents..."

"Hey, no sad times." Hazel holds up her hand, "Happy fun times. Like, uh..."

"You and Frank totally making out in front of Bianca." Reyna says in a snarky comeback.

"She was cool with it!" Hazel blushes deep scarlet.

"Yeah sure, that's why she was so cognizant." Reyna rolls her eyes.

"Wait, you're dating Frank?" I ask.

"Yup." She says proudly.

"And you're dating Percy." I point to Annabeth.

"And I'm working on Jason." Reyna says.

"What the heck is wrong with you guys?" I ask.

"What do you mean?" Reyna asks.

"Dating each other? I mean... You're really dating each other?" I ask, almost appalled by the idea.

"Yeah... Why?" Annabeth asks skeptically. I am unable to form a coherent sentence, I can't even fathom why they'd do this to themselves.

"Do you have a problem with it?" Hazel asks.

After a few more moments of incomprehensible English I manage to say, "Why would you do that to yourself?"

"Love someone?" Annabeth snorts, "Because, in case you haven't noticed, we're teenage girls. We fall in love. Get our hearts broken. Just like everyone else."

Yeah, I think, but most teenage girls don't have their hearts broken because their boyfriends die on them. Or maybe they die on their boyfriends. Is that really fair to either of them? Is it? I certainly don't think so. Why would I date anyone here? I'm probably going to die, and so are they.

But I won't say, "It's just strange that's all." I cover for myself, "I mean, dating someone you not only live with, but you're both sick."

"That's why we all get along so well." Annabeth says, "We understand each other."

"Well, I wouldn't date anyone here. Knowing I'm probably going to die anyway."

"You're not probably going to die." Hazel says braiding the braids she's made together, "If you were probably going to die, you wouldn't be living here. You'd be living in a hospital. But you're living here which means you still have a chance."

"Besides," Reyna sits up, "You're one of us now. Part of our big old happy family. We're like brothers and sisters, while some of us date. You don't have to."

"Well, duh, but I mean... It's just weird, don't you think?"

"Not at all." Annabeth shakes her head.

"Really? Not even a bit?"

"No. Why?"

Because it'd freak me out, "I don't know. It's just odd to me."

"You'll get used to it." Reyna promises. I doubt that.

"Done. Look how pretty it looks!" Hazel has me turn to show the other girls.

"Good job Hazel. It's nice." Annabeth says happily.

"Yeah, look it even shimmers in the sunset." Reyna chuckles.

I turn back to face them, still quiet unable to process the fact that they want to date each other.

"You're really pretty Piper." Hazel seems to notice.

"Thanks." I smile at her.

"You really are, actually." Annabeth says as if she's just now noticed.

"You look kind of familiar, now that I look at you." Reyna says.

In a hope to dissuade her from discovering who my father is I say, "I know. But I swear to god if you call me Pocahontas I'll mess you up."

The three of them start laughing.

"That's too perfect." Reyna laughs, "Please tell me you've dressed up like her for Halloween."

"Nope. I refuse." I fold my arms.

"You're no fun." She smirks. I notice a coldness suddenly engulf me in it's autumn arms. The sun has almost completely set on this October day, and the air is thick with chill.

"Let's go in yeah? Movie night starts at seven thirty. On the dot." Annabeth chuckles.

"Lead the way little miss." Reyna says sitting up to allow Annabeth the ability to stand. Annabeth helps Reyna stand before they walk in, followed by Hazel and I.

When we walk into the living room the guys are playing video games. Sparky speaks up, "We're watching Corpse Bride. Nico picked it."

"That's cool." Annabeth takes a seat beside Percy.

Hazel snuggles into Frank as they turn off their game.

"Piper," Chiron walks into the living room, placing a light hand on my shoulder, "Your dad is on the phone."

I look at him with wide eyes, "Is he dead?"

He gives me an odd look, "... No."

"Is he hurt?"

"... No."

"Then why is he calling?" I ask.

"I don't know, he wants to speak with you."

"You want us to wait?" Annabeth asks.

"Nah go ahead." I say walking with Chiron to the phone, "Hello?" I answer as Chiron walks over to a lounge chair, picking up a book to read.

"Hey, Pipes." He responds, "How's everything?"

"Fine, I guess. The people are nice."

"Have you made any friends?"

"Yeah, actually."

"Taking your meds?"

"Yes. Everything's been going pretty well."

"Listen, Pipes." I knew there was a reason he called, "I'm leaving."

"What?" I ask in confusion.

"I'm leaving tomorrow, I'll be in London for a shoot."

"You're leaving." Chiron looks up from his book.

"Yeah, the director reminded me when I got back yesterday and I've been so busy at work I forgot to mention it to Dr. Underwood."

"You just forgot to mention you're going overseas." I deadpan.

"I'm sorry, Pipes, it just slipped my mind. I wanted to make sure you knew to contact Jane's cell before mine, because mine won't be active over there. You're going to be okay, right?"

I chuckle deep in my chest, "Yeah, of course, I've been alright without you my whole life anyway."

He sighs, irritated. He's in no mood to humor me, and I'm in no mood to humor him, "Pipes, we've discussed this."

"No, you know what, just go. You're a grown ass man and can make your own decisions."

"You watch your mouth young lady, you know I don't like it when you curse."

"And who's going to stop me?"

"Piper, that's enough you're not home."

"Oh that's right, I'm not home, I'm in a home for sick kids."

"Piper, cut the attitude."

"Don't worry about me though, if I die while you're gone, you'll be the one who has to live with that, not me."

"Piper Marie McLean, you stop this instant." I wonder if he can hear me bite my lip in frustration, "I know you're not happy about it, but I'm going and I'll be gone until January. You need to know who to contact."

"Yeah, I got that."

"Watch it."

"Look is that all you called for?"

"You need to calm down."

"And why should I?"

"I am your father and you will not speak to me in that way." I huff as a response, "You need to get a grip."

"Yeah, and while I'm doing that, what are you going to do huh?"

"P-"

"Look, sort out your priorities while you're in London dad. Figure yourself out and then come talk to me."

"Don't make me come down there."

"You know what? Why don't you? I never get to see you anyway."

"Piper. Listen to me, you will stop acting like such a child."

"I am a child dad. How'd you forget?" Silence, "Hey, but I don't matter right? Just your job. Just your paycheck. So, go, forget about me. I don't care and neither do you."

His voice turns sharp, "Hang up."

"With pleasure." My voice wavers from its once angry firmness. I turn off the phone as I feel a hand creep up my back to my shoulder.

I turn into who I know to be Chiron, giving him permission, whether he was asking for it or not, to hug me.

"Is everything alright?" He asks.

"Yeah, just leaving the country for two and a half months."

"Oh my..."

"He wanted me to know who to contact. I'll give you the number."

"Come with me." Chiron leads me to his office, where I give him my dad's assistant, Jane's, number, "Do you want to talk?"

I shake my head, "Not really."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

"You can always come to me."

"Thank you... Do you think they're still watching?"

"Probably." He nods.

"May I?" I gesture to the door. He smiles quickly before letting me go. I walk back into the living room. I see the skeletons have just started the musical number.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Annabeth asks as I take a seat on the floor.

"Don't ask that. Please." I sigh.

"You okay?" Sparky asks.

"Yeah." I nod. The conversation ends there, for the movie, and the rest of the night.


	3. Chapter 3

Bianca died three days after my arrival. I watched everyone slip into an easy state of mourning. Like they were well versed in the art of it. They probably were, who knows how many deaths they've seen. Nico locked himself in his room when we found out. By mid afternoon, everyone had stopped trying to consol him from outside his door, and instead taken to sitting outside, while the day is still somewhat close to warm.

Only I stayed inside, watching the seven of them talk in hushed tones about the unfortunate passing of their friend.

"Are you going out with them?" Chiron asks walking up behind me.

I turn to look at him, "No, at least, I'm not planning on it."

"Why not?" He asks.

"Because..." I take a moment to think, "Because it's just not my place."

"Not your place?"

"I didn't know her. I won't pretend I did. They're probably telling stories about her, and I don't want to intrude on them keeping her memory alive. It's just not my place."

Chiron sighs beside me, "Well, you will have to spend some time outside, it's good for you."

"Do I have to?"

He gives me a look I can't quiet pinpoint, "Yes, you have to."

"Okay." I walk passed him.

"Where are you going?"

"Front yard. I'll people watch or something." I make a quick detour to grab a book off of Annabeth's shelf. I take a moment to scan the titles. Nearly vomiting when I see she has a copy of The Fault in Our Stars.

That's when I hear the door to Nico's room open.

I walk out to the hallway. Nico seems surprised when he notices me.

"Hey." I greet.

"Hey." He returns.

"Wanna go people watch?" I ask, before remembering that the kid is twelve and probably thinks that's creepy.

"Sure."

Not the answer I was expecting, but I'll take it.

We walk out the front door and sit on the perfectly cut grass. I keep silent as random joggers pass by, I don't want to freak the poor kid out, you know?

He lays flat on his back staring at the sky. I watch as a particularly obese man walks by with four wiener dogs.

"Piper?"

"Hm?" I ask. Neither of us moving from our positions.

"Do you believe in heaven?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like god, and Jesus, and stuff like that?"

Well... I can't lie to the kid, "No."

He sits up and looks at me. I stare down a girl in a bra and sweat pants, barely able to breathe as she runs, "Why not?"

"Because, I'm not Christian."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Then what are you?"

How many times have I been asked that? Why do people care about that so much? Why do they care what I believe? "I guess I believe in something. It's easier to believe in something than in nothing at all."

"But what do you believe?"

I finally look away from the cars passing by. Nico's eyes are filled with loss, grief, pain. Why didn't I just tell him heaven is real? He's desperate to believe in something. And if one person doesn't believe it, he won't know what to do.

"I believe that good people go to good places and bad people go to bad places. I just don't think there's a definite heaven and a definite hell. I don't believe some guy died and came back to life. I don't believe in some poor guy who got branded the title Satan and houses the eternally damned. I don't believe in Muhammad or Buddha. But I do believe that when we die the pain finally stops."

"What if it doesn't? What if it still hurts?" Nico asks me.

"Impossible." I respond with assurance, "Nothing can hurt more than being alive."

"So, Bianca's not in pain anymore?"

"No."

"But what if she was bad?"

"Was she?"

"Sometimes."

"Was she a bad person?"

"No."

"Then she's not hurting."

Nico allows tears to fall down his face, "She left me."

"She didn't want to."

"How do you know?"

How do I know? I don't. That's the real truth, "Because," I swipe some of his hair away from his eyes, "No one ever wants to leave behind the people they love."

"Then why'd she go?" His voice cracks, stinging my already ailing heart.

"Just because you don't want to go, doesn't mean you get to chose if you stay or go." He allows himself to lean into me. I pull him into me, so that his legs lay over mine. So, his cold breath and hot tears can be absorbed by my shirt. So, the people I had been starring at, won't stare back.

Two sick kids, one crying, the other lending what feels like useless comfort, sitting on the front lawn of their hospice home, in the middle of October. What a picture. I wonder what that lady, riding her bike thinks of us. I wonder if that mom at the stop sign thinks we've ditched school. I wonder if that man in the track suit, holding two Starbucks coffee's even cares.

I wonder who in the world cares.

I guess the only one, is me.

I start to sing, a nervous habit of mine. When someone is crying and I find myself at a loss. I sing silently, usually to myself as I attempt to think up some way to comfort them. I happen to get Nico lulled to sleep... Oops.

Now what do I do? I've got a twelve year old boy asleep on my lap, with no way to stand up, and no way to move him off of me without waking him.

I awkwardly manage to cradle him in my arms, but I can't stand up. I know I can't. I have a hard time standing usually. How am I supposed to perform such a feat with a kid in my arms?

I decide to attempt it anyway, because, what could possibly go wrong? Well, I almost pass out cold. That's what could go wrong.

I stand up and my vision blurs, I feel myself lurch forward, as if I'm spinning with the Earth. I get myself stable, though, I find myself panting helplessly. The kid's not that heavy, I'm just a weakling.

I turn back to the house and reach the door, despite my breathlessness. I am able, by some miracle, to get the door open. I'm even luckier to be greeted by Sparky and Annabeth.

"Hey..." I pant, "Can... One of you... Help?"

Sparky takes Nico out of my arms, allowing me to double over, in an attempt to regain my breathing.

"What happened?" Annabeth asks, placing on hand on my shoulder and the other on my back.

"He... And... One minute..." I hear myself gulping down air as Sparky takes Nico to his bedroom.

"Come on." Annabeth leads me into the living room, "The others are still outside." She assures me, guiding me to a seat, "You need water?"

"Just, air." My breathing regulates by the time Sparky walks into the living room.

"What were you two doing?" He asks taking the seat on my left as Annabeth has claimed my right.

I explain what happened, how I didn't want to intrude on the others, how Chiron told me I had to go outside, how Nico joined me on the front lawn excursion. I tell them little of our actual conversation. I only tell them enough to satisfy their curiosity.

"You wouldn't have been intruding." Annabeth assures me.

"Well, I would have been uncomfortable. Besides, Nico opened up to someone, right?"

"I guess so..." Sparky sighs, "The poor kid."

"I know." I sigh. A cough escapes my lips, as my parched throat attempts to regulate the sound of my voice.

"I'll go get you some water." Annabeth decides, patting my leg before she leaves.

"You don't have to be scared of us you know." Sparky tells me.

"Excuse me?" I find myself stuck in a coughing fit. He rubs my back as rough air scratches my throat again.

"I mean, you seem hesitant sometimes." Sparky says as Annabeth hands me the glass of water. Cool water that almost burns as I swallow, quells my obnoxious coughing, "And you don't have to be. We're not scary. We can actually be very nice."

"Can be, being the key words there Sparky?" Annabeth teases.

"Don't let her deceive you, Annabeth is capable of hostile things." Sparky tells me.

"I'm not scared of you, I just wanted to give you guys some space." I tell them. Before I can tack on an I'm fine now.

Sparky says, "And look what happened. Nobody was happy."

"Slow down there." Annabeth chuckles, "Piper, we don't need space. We're all fine. It's Nico we were worried about."

"Still worried about." Sparky mutters.

"We have another few hours until dinner." Annabeth informs me, "We should go back outside." Annabeth nudges me gently, "And you missy, will come with us."

"And if I don't want to?" I ask.

"Then we carry you." Sparky says, "Your choice."

"Apparently not." I sigh preparing myself to stand

"Atta girl." Annabeth smiles. The three of us head out back, not a single question raised, as to why I'd avoided them. I appreciate that as even they wonder, they keep their questions to themselves.

Nico's mom planned the funeral quickly. And let me tell you, it's an all day event.

We get the funeral home at eight in the morning. All of us dressed in our best. Well, minus me, I had to borrow a dress from Annabeth as I lacked the appropriate attire.

I stay seated, staring at the casket, refusing silently to lean over her body only to gaze at the cold dead body of someone I'd never known.

Nico and his mother walk up first, I see Nico reach into touch her, only for his hand to quickly recoil from her. Nico's mother rubs his back before he walks to sit beside me. Without warning, he cries into my side. I feel obligated to pull him closer, and when I do he grips the loose fabric of Annabeth's dress. I offer no soothing words, only a steady squeeze to his trembling body.

Sparky sits on Nico's other side, bypassing Bianca's casket. He attempts to sooth Nico, in the ways I can't. Sparky knew Bianca, after all. He tells Nico some story about Bianca. He reminds him that she was hurting.

He tells him that it's alright to cry, so long as it's not forever.

When the visitation period is over, Nico and his mother drive to the church, with our van right behind them. Bianca's hearse leads the way.

There's now a whole mass for her. I can't follow what's going on, if you want me to be honest. I read the prayers on the projection screen, I attempt to follow the hymn's , but I don't know what to do when we kneel to pray. Who do you pray to when you don't believe in a god?

I fake it as best I can, praying, I mean. When it come time for communion, I stay seated in my pew, making certain that my gaze only travels from the stained glass, to the statues of saints, to my knees. Never toward Bianca. I can't even allow myself a glance. I should feel bad about that... Right?

We're then to travel to the cemetery, but one look at that hill and I know I won't make it to her grave. I make the attempt anyway, but once we've cleared one hill, I spot another two hills, and neither of them look very easy to climb. I glance over to Percy, who's leaning on Annabeth against his own will. His breathing is heavier than mine, but he's more determined to be there for her than I am.

I walk slower down the hill, trying to save my energy, but as we clear this second one, I feel the scratchiness of my parched throat, breathing is so hard, and I hate it.

"Chiron?" Sparky speaks up, "Piper's not okay."

Everyone turns to look at me. I must be a complete mess, I can feel the back of my hair sticking to my neck, the heat from flush and strain filling my cheeks.

"Why don't you stay behind, Piper, we've still got a ways to go." I would have vocally agreed, if the moment I opened my mouth, air wasn't desperately groped for. Instead I nod, my embarrassing panting sounds like affirmation enough, though.

"Stay with her?" Chiron asks Sparky.

"Yeah." He nods walking to me. The others continue their trek toward Bianca's funeral.

I can't tell if my legs give out or if my brain just commands them to make me sit. Nevertheless, I fall on my butt, with Annabeth's dress puffing up around me.

"Thanks," I breathe.

He sits beside me, "You need to take better care of yourself." He says rubbing my back.

I lean over my legs, to relieve my lungs of some pressure.

"You could have said something sooner you know." He tells me.

"Why would I have done that?" I ask, sitting up slowly.

"Because, you're sick and need to pay attention to your body."

I look him into his eyes, "Thanks." I tell him.

"Sure, just be careful. Okay?"

"'Kay." I nod. After a moment I ask, "Is today hard for you?"

"Yes." He sighs lifting a hand to scrunch some of his hair, "I miss her. But, I always miss them."

"How long have you been in the program."

He smirks, "You make it sound like it's some kind of top secret thing."

"Maybe it is." I retaliate.

"I was ten, now I'm sixteen."

There's a silence that settles between us. A silence that I find awkward and uncomfortable, "So what's your real name?"

He chuckles, "Do you actually care?"

What an odd question. Do I actually care? I'm tempted to smack him with words. Tempted, but I decide against it, "I'm curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat." He tells me.

"Curiosity killed the cat but satisfaction brought it back." I raise an argument.

He gives me a look of admiration before answering, "Jason."

"Which do you prefer?" I ask.

"Oh, I couldn't care less what people call me."

"You sure?"

"Jason. I prefer Jason."

"Okay, what's your favorite color?"

"My favorite color?"

"It's an important part of someone's character okay?"

"Blue. Yours?"

"Purple."

He nods, "Favorite animal?"

"I'm tempted to say cats, but I'm actually going to go with birds."

"Birds?" He chuckles.

"Birds couldn't care even if they tried, okay? I admire that amount of not caring."

"Mine's wolves."

"Hm..."

"What?"

"I just totally see you as a dog kind of person. Okay, favorite food?"

"Brownies."

"That's not a food."

"Sure it is. What's your favorite food?"

"Anything with pasta."

"Favorite season?"

"Winter."

"Huh?"

"You know, December, January February?"

"I know that. But winter isn't anyone's favorite season."

"It's mine."

"Why?"

"Because you don't get judged for staying indoors or drinking hot chocolate. You can wear sweaters and everyone just seems a little bit nicer. Plus snow. Snow is my favorite. Also, winter brings Christmas. I love Christmas lights. Winter just seems magical to me."

"Point taken."

"Favorite season?"

"Summer."

"Yuck." I tease.

"Hey, Christmas is all fine and dandy, but I'd take a beach day over skiing any day."

"Favorite holiday?"

"Thanksgiving. Yours?"

"Halloween."

"Not Christmas?"

"Any day that I'm not judged by what I wear is good day."

We continue this cycle of questions, slowly getting past the favorites and into each others stories. He has a sister. His family has four dogs. Percy's his cousin. He's scared to die.

I tell him I have no siblings, that my mom left when I was young. I don't have any pets, except for my neighbors cat that likes me better. That I'm not afraid to die.

He says I'm brave to be so fearless in the face of death. I say I find nothing brave in my indifference toward life.

"Is that a challenge?" He asks.

"Is what a challenge?"

"To make you care about being alive?"

"I care about being alive, I just don't care about dying."

"Challenge accepted." He smiles, "I'm gonna make you love living so much, you'll never want to leave."

"Good luck with that." I tease as our group comes back up the hill, "Time to go, Sparky." I stand up, taking a moment to let my body figure itself out.

"Try, if you can, to call me Jason as much as possible." He laughs.

"And why would I do that?" I smile.

"Because, I like the way it sounds."

I feel myself questioning him, but before I can ask the others join us. We walk back to the van. The solemn silence filling me with sadness. Even though the past hour had been nothing but laughter and smiles. I don't think I could manage even a twitch of a smile as we drive back to Camp Jupiter. Who can smile, when the world surrounding them has been engulfed a mourning?

Who can smile when they don't understand how to mourn?


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: I have a Christmas story that isn't a Christmas story yet. If you have ideas for Christmas oneshots go comment on that story!**

The next two weeks after Bianca's death were like quiet healing for the others around me. I spent my time reading the many books stacked on Annabeth's side of the room. But reading has never been my thing, so I'll skip that.

What's been interesting...

Uh...

"Pipes?" I look up from the book I'd been trying to read, that had lost me with it's complicated words and confusing plot. Reyna's standing at my door.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"Come to my room?"

"Sure." I practically fling the book onto Annabeth's bed and follow Reyna out the door. When we get to her and Hazel's room she closes the door. I sit on her bed, I presume it's her bed at least. The two beds look identical.

"Chiron said I should talk to you." She tells me laying out on the opposite bed, perching her head in her palm.

"Why?"

She gives me a small smile, "Because he told me your dad's overseas."

"Oh." I deflate a bit, "Not like your mom is overseas. He's just in London."

"Still, he sounds like he's all you have." I shrug, "My dad killed himself you know."

My eyes widen, "No, I didn't actually."

Reyna smirks at her hand, "Hung himself when he came back from the war. Saw too much, I guess."

"Damn."

She nods, "I have my sister and my mom. And my mom is pretty much out of the picture. My sister's trying to move on, and I feel like I'm only holding her back." I can't speak. How could I? I'm a stranger to this kind of thing, "I feel pretty guilty sometimes. Because she should move on with her life and not worry about me... It sucks."

I nod halfheartedly.

"So, no siblings? No mom?"

"No siblings. No mom." I answer.

"When'd she die?"

"Who?"

"Your mom?"

Let me tell you a secret, okay? I wish my mom was dead, because then I wouldn't believe she just abandoned me. I could believe that she'd loved me enough but couldn't be with me because she'd died. It's stupid, but it'd be easier if I knew my mother was dead.

"She's... She's not dead."

"What happened to her?"

"Nothing. She just... left." Reyna looks confused, so I clarify, "She walked out on us, my dad and I. She left before I could remember."

"Did she leave you anything? A number? An address?"

"Nope. She didn't leave anything." I tell her.

"That's so sad." She says. I want to scream at her. How on earth is it sad that I never knew someone then the fact that your father killed himself!? Perspective please!

"Let's not talk about that." I say.

"Oh... okay."

"You don't know what else to say... Do you?"

"Not really."

I nod, "I like it here." I start looking around her room, "It's nice, not too quiet. Everyone's nice."

"Yeah." Reyna nods.

"So... What do girls talk about?" I chuckle.

"Uh... Other girls?" Reyna laughs, "Gossip, celebrities, boys."

"Gross." I laugh.

"Yeah, whatever, every girl is a hopeless romantic."

"Not this girl." I say.

"Come on, you can't tell me that The Fault in Our Stars doesn't melt your heart."

I fake a gag, "Don't ever say that again. The Fault in Our Stars is the worst representation of romance ever."

"You're not a real girl." Reyna says, "Did you at least cry during that Notebook?"

"No."

"Okay, neither did I. What about A Walk to Remember?"

"Yuck."

"Atonement?"

"Good story, bad romance."

"P.S. I love you?"

"Shudders." I start smiling at her attempt to make me sappy.

"Water For Elephants?"

"I wanted to punch her in the face."

"Dear John?"

"Don't even lie, that movie was about the father son not the romance."

"Wow you really do hate romantic movies."

"I hate romantic anything."

"Bummer." Reyna chuckles, "I thought I had you pegged."

"As what?"

"The quiet cutie." She informs me.

"I prefer to define it's always the quiet ones." I tell her.

"Oh?" I nod, "What does that mean?"

"That means, I'm a rebel."

"Really. You?"

"Uh huh."

"Interesting." Reyna nods, "But does that mean we can't gossip about boys then?"

"You can, I'll listen, I guess." Oh no, I take it back. I don't want to talk about this!

"Okay then, so the other day, Jason and I were talking and he totally hinted that he has a crush on me."

"Really." I attempt to sound interested.

"Yeah, he said, that I'm the kind of girl boys dream of." She tells me, "Uhg, and he's just so... You know? And he's so thoughtful and sweet, and god I just want to kiss him."

I nod as she talks about him, laughing and adding in a comment or two as she talks.

To be quiet honest with you, I don't spend much time actually listening to anything she says about Jason. I don't care if she thinks he's the one.

The truth is, I would love to believe in true love. That love at first sight is real. That my soul mate is walking around this earth somewhere.

But I don't.

Why?

Because, even if I do have someone perfect for me out there in the world. I'm still sick. I'm still steps away from shaking death's hand. And if I believed in love like she does... Well, I wouldn't want anyone to suffer with me gone from the world.

So, I listen, quietly hoping for a change of subject. Finding relief when Leo grabs us for dinner.

The next morning I wake up to a feeling of wetness. In shock I get up and scurry off to the bathroom, leaving Annabeth in her askew sleeping position.

I see the blood stains on my pants first. After cursing under my breath I search the bathroom for any kind of tampon/pad. No such luck.

I take a deep breath, and look at my reflection. This is just my luck. I get my period and have no way to clean myself up. Just great.

I hurry back to my room, grab the first thing I find, and sprit back to the bathroom. Once a wad of toilet paper is shoved into my underwear, I walk to Dr. D's 'exam' room. Really it's just his office, but it has a bed in it and the cabinets are filled with medical supplies instead of paper's like Chiron's is.

I knock on the door, hoping that no one is with him.

Chiron open's the door, "Piper, are you alright?" He asks, spotting the crumpled mess of clothes in my arms.

"I... Uh... I... Got my period." I mumble under my breath.

"You what?" He asks opening the door a bit wider, to reveal Dr. D lounging in his office chair.

"I got my period." I say a tiny bit louder.

"You're going to have to speak a little louder." He says letting me into the room.

"Uh... You know that... And uh..." Why couldn't one of them be a girl?

"Is there blood on those clothes?" Dr. D asks having observed the mound in my arms.

"Uh... Yeah." I admit.

Chiron grows concerned as Dr. D almost sighs. Dr. D scribbles something down onto a note pad sitting in front of him as Chiron asks questions, "What happened? Where are you hurt?"

"Chiron." Dr. D says putting his pen down and standing up, "She's on her period."

I grip my clothes a bit tighter.

Chiron looks at me, "You get one of those?"

I look up at him with a face of, you're kidding me right?

"Alright, let's see here." Dr. D grabs a binder with my name on it. Probably my medication log, "You haven't taken your medications for this morning?"

"No sir."

He bites his lip, "But you took your Anticoagulants and your Corticosteroids last night so they're still in your system." He puts the binder up, "I don't think I can give you anything for the symptoms, I can give you an iron supplement but you're on blood thinners and we don't want them to react."

"Honestly, I just need tampons." I speak up, finding myself irritated.

"Chiron, go get her some tampons." Dr. D says grabbing my binder again and marking something in it, "Piper, sit on the bed please."

Chiron leaves without any other questions.

Dr. D begins to examine me.

"Why did Chiron ask me that?" I ask as he takes my blood pressure before checking my pacemaker.

"Because, none of the other girls here get periods." Dr. D says.

"Really?"

"Really." He responds.

After the silence of me taking deep rattling breaths I ask, "Why don't they?"

He writes something down, "Hazel and Reyna are on medication's that don't allow their bodies to produce the hormones necessary to menstruate, and Annabeth had her ovaries frozen when her family thought she had cancer."

What luck.

"Any symptoms?" He asks rolling back over to his desk.

"Cramps." I realize suddenly, "Nauseous."

"Try not to throw up." He says, "Lay down." After he prods me for a few moments he says, "You can go."

"I can?"

"Just don't do anything stupid. You may be sick, but you're still a teenage girl."

"... What do I do with my clothes?" I ask.

"Oh... Right." He takes me to the laundry room, helping me to pretreat them. Then he lets me on my way.

The first thing I do is wake up Annabeth.

"Hey, get up." I poke her.

"Go away."

"Come on." I fake a whine that turns into laughter, "Get up you lazy!"

"Uhg!" Annabeth laughs rolling to face me, "You're the little sister I thought I wanted until I got her."

"Let's get up Princess. I'm already up for the day, you might as well too."

"God, fine." She laughs sitting up.

"What's on today's schedule?" I ask walking back to my bed. I throw my blankets over the spot I think I may have stained.

"Game day."

"A bunch of sick kids are going to play football together." I dead pan.

"No, we're going to play board games." Annabeth rolls her eyes at me.

"Oh!"

She laughs at me, "You're adorable."

We get to breakfast where Jason, Reyna, Leo, and Percy are sitting. I opt for cereal this morning as a cramp makes my stomach feel like it's shrinking.

"Hey baby." Annabeth kisses Percy as she takes her seat.

"Hey."

"Piper I demand a kiss." Leo decides.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because Percy and Frank sicken me in the mornings." He says making everyone chuckle.

"Come here." I smile.

He plops down beside me and I give him a sisterly kiss on the cheek, that turns into me licking him.

"What are you!? A dog!"

"You asked for it. Literally."

Frank and Hazel walk into the dinning room as Leo takes his seat.

"What's up?" Hazel asks.

"Piper gave me rabies!" Leo complains.

"I didn't bite you." I say.

"True." Reyna agrees, "And you did deserve it."

"Who's side are you on!?"

"Hers obviously."

"You suck."

"Again," Annabeth speaks up, "she didn't bite you."

After breakfast Annabeth announces that it's game day to everyone else. Annabeth gets the game set up while the rest of us linger at the breakfast table. Annabeth calls us into the living room five minutes later.

I take a seat on the floor in front of the obnoxiously colorful board. The Game Of Life. How ironic.

Jason sits beside me. I look toward the undecorated Christmas tree where Nico stares up at the plastic bristles. For one thing it's the middle of November and the tree is set up. But another thing is Nico. He looks so lost, "Nico, you coming?" I invite him holding out a hand. He nods and crawls over to sit beside me.

"Everyone knows the rules." Percy decides, "I'll spin first." He reaches around Annabeth to spin the spinner. I let my hand reach up to my stomach. Stupid period cramps are stupid.

Jason looks at me with a twinge of concern before forcing himself to watch the game again. Annabeth goes first, then Reyna, Nico, Percy, Me, Leo, Frank, Jason, and Hazel last.

Annabeth and the others all go to college, I do not.

"Little rebel are we?" Frank teases as Percy shuffles the salary cards.

"Let's be real here, in the actual world college is not a choice. So when given the option I'm not gonna go for it." I draw a career card. How much irony can be fit into this stupid game?

"An Actress." Hazel smirks at me.

"Salary card." I gesture for Percy to stop shuffling as a cramp stabs my gut. I press my lips together as I draw a card.

"That's not fair." Percy decides when I've draw the eighty thousand salary card.

I shrug, rubbing my arms as if it'll help quell the pain.

"You okay?" Jason asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I look at him easily.

"Leo, college?" Annabeth asks.

"Hell yeah I'm going to college, cause I'm not getting that opportunity in real life!" Leo says causing us all to laugh.

We get through another go around. With Frank missing a turn for his term papers, Percy in more debt because of his Spring Break in Florida, and me currently leading with one life tile and no debt.

I feel the pang of another cramp, forcing my eyes shut, as Nico graduates. Periods are painful, when did evolution decide this was a good idea?

"Did you take your meds?" Jason asks me.

The irrational rage, that I know is irrational burns inside of me. Or maybe that's my uterus throwing a temper tantrum because I'm not pregnant.

"Yes, Jason, I did." I tell him simply. In fact I would have taken more meds if I could have, thanks very much.

I hear the front door open and feel myself relax a bit more.

"Seriously, though. You okay?" Jason asks again.

"Piper, could you come here?" Chiron calls for the front hall. I get up, swiftly walking out to him, "Sorry, I took so long." He holds out the grocery bag to me.

"Thanks." I sigh but offer a small smile, before I rush off to the bathroom. Much to my dismay I find that I've stained my clothes, again. I toss my jeans and underwear to the corner before I notice my blood stained thighs. This is ridiculous. Normal, but ridiculous. It's completely unfair that this is the only function my body is capable of. I mean really. I can't breathe, I can't pump my own blood but I can sure get pregnant if the circumstances arise.

I spend a good ten minutes cleaning myself up, changing, and getting my clothes pretreated before getting back to the living room.

"Welcome back." Frank greets.

"You had like eight babies." Percy tells me.

"How the-"

"Don't ask." Annabeth advises, "Did you change?"

"Yup." I push away my self consciousness as another cramp fills my body.

"Why?" Reyna asks, "You hate dresses."

"Whose turn is it?" I ask changing the subject.

"Mine!" Leo announces spinning an eight on the spinner. I feel a hand creep onto my lower back, smoothing out the fabric and warm the skin beneath it. The gesture is soothing and even though it's odd that Nico of all people would be that intuitive I still feel a bit touched.

Maybe I'll cry, you never know with period moods.

Just as I land on the adopt twins space Reyna walks off unannounced.

"Where's she going?" I ask when I've collected my ninth and tenth children and their accompanying life tiles.

"She probably has to throw up." Hazel says, "Don't ask her, though. She's very proud and a bit sensitive about it."

"Okay." I nod, "Leo taking his turn. By the time we get back to Hazel's turn, Reyna's back. She has a sheen of sweat that forces the wisps of hair not in her braid to stick to her forehead, post-crying eyes, and yet she has a small smile.

"Why are there tampons on the bathroom counter?" She asks sitting on the couch.

I let out a gasp before smacking a hand over my mouth.

I look down at my lap so I won't have to look at everyone's eyes resting on me.

"Sweetie, you're on your period?" Annabeth asks.

"Uh... Well... Uh... Yeah." I say down to the floor.

"You poor unfortunate soul." Reyna chuckles.

"Did you at least take something?" Hazel asks.

"No..." I bite my upper lip.

"Why not?" Percy asks.

"Dr. D... He doesn't want me to OD."

"Why are you embarrassed?" Jason asks.

"Because, this is humiliating." I tell him, feeling my cheeks burn.

"It's normal." Frank says, "Look, Pipes, each and everyone of us has bled somewhere. It's okay."

"Yeah but-"

"But nothing." Leo says, "Bro, you're bleeding because you didn't get pregnant. That's a good thing. You are literally the only here who has bled for a good reason."

"Yeah." Frank says, "When I bleed it's a problem. But when you bleed it's because you were smart enough to not make a baby this month."

"You don't have to be uncomfortable with yourself." Percy says, "I mean, shit, my lungs are filled with puss but you don't see me being all embarrassed."

"Or me," Leo says, "I am perpetually fever ridden but I'm not self conscious."

"Point is." Annabeth looks at me, "You don't have to be embarrassed because of what your body does."

I nod as Hazel takes her turn.

Alright one more thing happens during this game.

As Annabeth gets to retirement, Jason literally collapses onto my lap. I scream, and everyone else stops.

Nico chuckles beside me, "Great timing Grace."

"What the-!?"

"Piper it's okay, he just forgot to breathe." Annabeth tells me.

"He what!?"

"He does this sometimes. His body forgets to tell some of his bodily functions to work. He just forgot to breathe, turn him on his back okay?" I flip him over just as she says, "Now smack him."

"What?"

"Smack his chest."

"Why!?"

"Just do it."

So with the heel of my wrist I smack his chest, I'm surprised to find it works. His chest fills with air and after a moment his eyes open.

"Wha happen?"

"You did it again Sparky! God, learn to breathe dude." Percy chuckles.

"Fuck you, first of all." Jason rubs his face, "Can I lay here a second?" He asks me.

"Uh... Sure."

"Thanks." He breathes heavily.

Yeah, I think that's when I learned to let go, even just a little bit.


	5. Chapter 5

It's finally December first. I can finally up the Christmas cheer and not be judged for it! I walk out to the living room, full of cheer. Only, I find all of the fun being sucked out of me when I see my friends. Annabeth is laying on Percy as she reads a book. Percy's fallen asleep with her wrapped in his arms. Jason, Reyna, and Hazel are watching the History channel, of all things. Nico is flipping through his mythomagic deck. Leo is fiddling with something while Frank watches him in confusion.

What a downer. Even though the room is decorated for the holiday it just looks sad.

I walk out of the living room and into the kitchen. I start searching the cabinets and pantry, having executively decided on how to uplift the spirit in this house. I take mental notes on everything we're going to need. Then, I march into my room throw on my snow boots and jacket, before walking back into the living room.

"Alright, let's go." I announce.

"Huh?" Percy wakes with a start.

"Come on, we've got stuff to do." I wave them up.

"And where are we going?" Annabeth asks.

"Shopping." I tell them.

"For what exactly?" Reyna asks not even moving an inch.

"Oh, come on where's your spirit of adventure? Where's your _Christmas_ spirit?"

"I'm not going anywhere, it's stupid cold out there." Hazel folds her arms.

"Plus we can't just leave." Annabeth says.

"I'll go!" Leo jumps up to join me.

"Alright!" I high five him.

"I don't see why not." Nico smirks.

"Anyone else up for adventure?"

"You're crazy, Chiron will never let you go." Reyna assures me.

"Three's a party anyway." I laugh leading the two of them out of the house. Percy nearly runs out to meet us. We link arms and halfway skip to the supermarket, until Percy and I can't breathe. When we get into the store Percy jumps on the cart and uses it to propel him down the aisles. I realize it's a school day when all of the stay-at-home moms and elderly people stare at us with confused and angered looks.

I toss bags upon bags of sugars, flour, and other assorted cooking items in the cart.

"What are we doing Pipes?" Nico asks when we walk down the candy aisle.

"Gingerbread houses." I tell the three of them, "Pick out candies."

"Oh my god, that's a bad idea." Percy laughs before picking out every single blue candy in the aisle. Like, damn, all the blue candies.

Once our cart is full we check out. Our arms full of grocery bags, we stagger back to the house, laughing with every stumble.

We bust through the front door and into the kitchen.

"Okay, Percy get out the flour and start measuring out six cups." I start opening up the cabinets to get enough measuring utensils and such for our recipe.

"What on Earth?" Annabeth asks as the others who did not come with us gather behind her.

"We're baking!" Leo says excitedly.

"Gingerbread houses." Nico informs them.

"Really?" Reyna chuckles, folding her arms.

"Really!" I tell her, as I'm about to climb onto the counter to reach the mixing bowls someone reaches over me and grabs them, "Thanks, Frank."

"Sure thing, shorty." He winks at me.

"Don't ever call me shorty again." I chuckle as he places the bowls on the counter.

"You can't be serious." Hazel takes a seat at the island.

"Why not?" I ask pointing Frank up to the electric beater.

"Because, it's so unlike you." Hazel lets herself laugh a bit more.

"What can I say? It's always the quiet ones." I wink at Reyna.

"Pipes how much flour again?" Percy asks.

"Who's making a house?"

"Everyone!" Leo proclaims, "Everyone is!"

"One batch makes one house. Six cups per batch... fifty four cups of flour." I tell him.

"Where's the recipe?" Annabeth asks searching the counters for it.

"Memorized." I tell her, "Jason, is there a radio around here?"

"Christmas music?" He smiles.

"You've got it."

"You have the entire recipe memorized?" Reyna questions skeptically.

"Yes ma'am."

"Why?"

"Why not?" I return, "Nico, measure out the sugar?"

And so I direct the gang into making our batches of gingerbread. And we snack a bit too.

At one point Dr. D walks in, probably curious as to where we were since the living room was entirely empty.

"What are you doing?" He asks the moment he sees us.

"Baking." Hazel says.

"Baking?"

"Yup." Percy nods glancing at the oven. We're on batch four of nine, and Percy is impatiently waiting for the cookies to be done. Percy and Frank are sitting at the breakfast table, their girlfriends sitting on their laps. Reyna, Jason, and Leo are playing go fish on the kitchen floor. Nico and I are watching. I'm sure this is a sight he's never seen before.

Dr. D shrugs and walks back out of the kitchen.

Holly Jolly Christmas comes on the radio. Without a second to lose, I grab Nico and start to dance with him. He surprises me when he laughs and surprises me even more when he sings along.

Soon everyone's singing or dancing. Percy shouts the lyrics more than anything. We laugh and sing until all of the gingerbread has been cooked.

As the others sing about the most wonderful time of the year, I make the icing.

"Nico can you grab me some more powdered sugar?" I ask as the mixture seems a bit to liquidy for my taste.

"Yeah Nico, get moving." Percy teases.

"Vaffanculo." Nico directs to a now confused Percy. I'll translate, Literally the term means 'go put something in your asshole.' but directly translates to English as, 'fuck you'.

"Nico, do not use that kind of language, it's Christmas, for crying out loud!" I scold him.

Now everyone is staring at me with wide eyes. Nico's jaw has dropped, "You understood me?"

"Yes, I did." I allow a victorious smirk to melt across my face as I bite back calling him, young man.

"You _speak_ Italian?" Jason asks.

"Yes, I do." I turn and make a face.

"Since when?" Leo asks.

"Since my dad and I spent two years living in Italy." I choose my words carefully.

"You're bilingual." Jason chuckles.

"Well... No."

"Huh?" Percy asks.

"I actually speak four languages." I tell them as Nico scoops in more sugar.

"Which four?" Hazel asks me, clearly fascinated.

"English, Italian, French, and Spanish." I say letting Nico know he can stop pouring sugar into the bowl.

"Why?" Leo asks.

"Well, my dad is big about being culturally aware and stuff. He had me learning French when I was four. And then I realized French was almost exactly like Spanish so I took online courses and somehow managed to get the hang of it. When we moved to Italy I found out that it was exactly Spanish, so it was easy to pick up." I test the consistency of the frosting, "It's ready."

"As am I!" Percy says excitedly.

We sit down and begin constructing our houses.

"Someone should get the camera." Annabeth says expertly gluing her pieces to the plate she's using.

Nico licks some frosting off of his thumb, "For the album?"

"Yes sir."

"Yeah, because I want to give someone a picture of me with icing all over my mouth." Reyna laughs creating a paved sidewalk leading up to the out line of her house.

"We could always throw some sprinkles at you, then you'd pop a little bit more." Leo teases and receives a swift kick from under the table.

Hazel was the one to leave and come back with the camera, "Smile." She says snapping a few photos.

"Pass me the gummy bears, love?" Annabeth asks me. Love?... Okay. I pause my stacking of broken bits to hand her the bowl of gummy bears.

"What are you even doing?" Percy asks looking at my house.

"Cobblestone." I tell him, "You're one to talk, you dyed a bowl of frosting blue so your entire house could be blue. What's up with that anyway?"

"Oh, why'd you ask that?" Annabeth cringes.

"Let me tell you a story young one." He says sticking more blue sugar sprinkles to the roof of his house, "When I was a kid my mom's asshole ex husband told her blue food wasn't real and she gave him the biggest fuck you of his life, because she spent the rest of their marriage making us only blue food. This is an homage to my mama."

"Well, that happened." I chuckle, "Hazel, camera." I snatch the camera from her and start taking pictures of everyone around the table with their half finished houses.

"My mom is going to love this, huh, Perce." Annabeth showed off her half done project.

"I love it." He says, then turns to me, "Annabeth's mom is an architect."

"I should so give this to my mom." Leo then decides.

Reyna starts laughing, "I should send my mom and sister a snap chat of this."

They all start talking about their moms, and before you start trying to feel bad for me. I don't give a flying fuck. They have moms, I don't, so fucking what? I have a half-ways dad and them. What more could I need?

"Dude your mom is the best though." Jason laughs with Percy.

"My mama is the best mama." He shrugs.

"I'm sure." I chuckle.

"Your mom has nothing on my mama." He tells me.

"You're right, she doesn't." I smile sticking some m&m shingles to the roof of my house.

"You don't like your mom?" He asks.

"I don't know, never met her."

Everyone pauses for a second. Percy swallows awkwardly, "Oh... I'm sorry."

"It's nothing." I assure him, "I just don't have a mom."

"That sucks." Leo says.

"Not really."

"You don't miss her?" Annabeth asks.

"How do you miss someone you never met?" I return the question.

"But, she's your mom." Frank says.

"But, I've never met her." I chuckle.

"Did she die?" Hazel asks.

"I don't know." I tell her.

"Did she just leave?" Jason asks.

"I don't know." I shake my head, "It's cute that you're worried, but you really don't need to be. I don't have a mom, do I care? Sometimes. Do I crave motherly affection? No." They still look at me with pitying glances, "I'm fine, seriously."

"My mama's going to adopt you." Percy smiles continuing to add yet more blue to his house.

"Will she?" I laugh returning to my roof.

"Oh yeah, she adopts everyone. Maybe she'll knit you something, I don't fucking know."

We continue to build our gingerbread houses until construction is finished. We all help to clean up and then, like stupid little kids who are proud of their art project, we show Chiron our houses. He gives me a firm, "You shouldn't have left the house without permission." And I return with a, "Yeah, well, you know."

Before we know it, it's Christmas eve. Which brings the Christmas party! I'm so excited about this, you don't even know. I actually put on a dress so I can look presentable. Annabeth lets me borrow her makeup and I look hot. I don't even care if I sound self centered. I'm rocking my pacemaker that is clearly visible in this red and green dress. I am rocking these pumps, and this holly jolly red lipstick.

"Damn girl, can you be my date?" Annabeth asks when she walks back into our room.

"Sure thing sugar." I smile softly.

"You ready? About half of the parents are here."

"Let's go!" I laugh walking out with her.

"Pipes, I want you to meet my parents." Annabeth takes me over to the couple sitting on one of the couches, talking animatedly about something, "Mom, dad, this is my roommate, Piper."

"Hi." I shake their hands.

"You look lovely." Her mom comments.

"Thank you."

"How old are you?" Her dad asks.

"Fifteen."

"Mom, sis, this is Piper." Reyna brings her family to greet me.

"Hi." I smile shaking their hands.

"Pipes!" Percy calls to me, "Come meet my mama!"

"Excuse me." I chuckle walking over to Percy. I'm really glad his step dad isn't here. It would have been really awkward for us to meet like that.

"Mama, this is Piper." He introduces me.

"Hi sweetheart." She shakes my hand.

"Hi." I greet back.

"My son says I need to adopt you." She chuckles.

"Did he." I give him a humored glance.

"I'm looking out for you baby doll."

"Don't call me baby doll."

"You prefer Beauty Queen?"

I cackle, "Sure do."

I get tackled with a hug, "Merry Christmas too you!" Leo sings out of tune.

"Merry Christmas!" I shout back trying not to laugh too hard.

"Come on my mom and dad are here!" He drags me over to meet them.

"Mijo, what are you doing?" His mother laughs.

"This is my new best friend and she's been deprived of a mother all her life so we need to love her." He says.

"You suck!" I laugh shoving him off of me, "I'm Piper."

"Hi." His mother smiles at me, I notice how warm her presence is. Maybe it's because they're the closest to the fire place, but she's just so inviting.

"Pipes!" Hazel runs up to me, "Come meet our dad!"

"Okay!" I let her drag me over to Nico, two woman, and one man.

"Mom, dad, Mrs. Di Angelo. This is Piper, she's awesome."

"Nice to meet you guys." I greet them.

In walks a couple with another girl walking beside them, "Hello, hello." The woman greets.

"Beryl you guys made it." Mrs. Jackson walks to them hugging the woman tightly.

"Ugh, the weather was absolutely atrocious, Sally. I couldn't believe it."

"Hey, Thalia." Nico and Hazel greet the younger girl.

"Hey guys, what's up with you?"

"Well, still breathing. Everything's grand." Nico rolls his eyes.

"Thalia, this is Piper." Hazel introduces me, "Piper this is Jason's older sister."

"He's told me about you." I tell her.

"He's told me about you." She smirks at me.

"Really?"

"Yes ma'am." She chuckles, "You sure sound like something special." Huh?

"Hey guys!" Jason walks in. He hugs his parents before greeting his sister, "Corrupting my friends?"

"Always. It's a pleasure and a pastime. Plus I need to catch the newbie up." I think she winks at him.

"Pipes, you look awesome."

"Thanks." I snort, "What happens when I try, ladies and gents."

"Is everyone here?" Jason asks.

"Frank's mom and dad are going to be late. And Piper's dad's not here yet." Hazel answers.

"Oh, he's not coming." I say.

"Really?" Hazel asks.

"Ye-yeah?" I chuckle.

"Why not?" Jason asks.

"He's not in the States right now." I shrug.

"Aw, Pipes." Hazel sighs.

"Hey don't worry about it." I wrap my arms around their necks, "I have you guys."

"How cute." Thalia chuckles, throwing in an eye roll. I stick my tongue out at her, she retaliates immediately.

After a bit of fun we sit down to a big dinner together. Frank's mom is the sweetest lady ever, by the way, if you were keeping up.

We all go back out to the living room so we can watch a Christmas film... Only something unexpected happens.

"Piper," Chiron's face is full of light, "There's someone here for you."

Everyone smiles at me, hoping my dad came through to be here with me on the holiday. My face, however, falls, "Huh?"

In enters, Jane, my dad's personal assistant, with an arm load of FedEx boxes, eternally texting. She starts talking quickly, "I have to get going to but your father wanted me to drop these off, so..." She drops a box into my hands, "This is from him in London." She drop another box on top of the original one, "This is from your mother." She begins to read through a text, "He wants you to know he flies back in on the fifteenth and he'll come visit you then."

Mrs. Jackson, who like everyone else just assumes this is a good thing, walks over to me, "I'll put these under the tree for you, honey." She tells me.

"I think that's all, for now." Jane flips through tasks on her phone.

"Back up." I shake my head, "My mother?"

Jane scoffs, "It'd almost be adorable how confused you are, if you weren't so stupid."

Well... That's our relationship for you. "Hey-"

"Don't blame me for your father caudling you all these years." She sends some kind of text, "Besides, it's not _my_ place to tell you about that woman." She starts walking off.

"Wait." I follow her to the front, "Why did she-"

"Look." Jane turns to me sharply, "Your mother. Didn't. Want. You. Get that? She left for a reason, and that reason was you. She left you and your father, and if you want my opinion, she left because she knew you'd be such a burden."

I look down at my shoes.

"You are exactly like her, worthless, dead weight." She opens the door behind her, "Just because she sends you gifts, doesn't mean anything. All it means is that she wants to keep her own name clean."

"But-"

"Don't hurt yourself, thinking to hard. Just remember, no matter how many gifts she sends you, it will never make up for the fact, that she gave you the genes that are killing you." With that she walks back to her car and speeds away.

I count my breaths, one, two, three. Why would she say that? Four, five, six. Snow blows onto me, lightly kissing my hot cheeks. Seven, eight, night. Why is it that she's the only honest one?

I feel a warm hand on my shoulder as he closes the door. Chiron looks at me, I stare at my feet.

"Piper... I'm so sorry,"

I shake myself out of my trance, "Don't worry about it." I put a smile on my face, "Let's have Christmas."

And why are they all standing there looking so sad?

"Polar Express time, guys! Let's do this Christmas thing." I laugh walking over to them.

Mrs. Jackson squeezes me to her, and before I know it, I'm at the center of a group hug.

"I'm fine, guys, really." I tell them as the whole group slowly lets go.

Mrs. Jackson smiles at me, "I've adopted you." I let out a burst of laughter, "I'm serious, I have. You're now my only daughter."

"Cool." I smile at her.

"I got a sister for Christmas!" Percy tells everyone, "Now we can watch the movie."

If you haven't seen Polar Express, do yourself a favor and fix yourself now. It's gold.

When the movie ends Annabeth smiles at everyone, "It's midnight." She informs us.

"Merry Christmas." Everyone shares their smiles and joy.

Chiron tells us to open our gifts. With all of us surrounding the tree Some of the mom's take pictures.

I open my dad's gift. He sent over clothes, some jewelry, and a snow globe. I take a moment to watch the others. They smile at their parents, hugging their families as they open their gifts. I feel a warmth inside of me watching them all. Nico's face, elated with joy, hits me a little bit harder. It's his first Christmas without his sister, and he's smiling like that.

I turn back to the box from my mother I question if I really want to open it. If I want to have a gift from my mother. Eventually curiosity gets the better of me, and I open it anyway.

Inside I find a sweater and a mug that says, 'I'm a Fucking Princess' on it. But then I pull out a hefty envelope. Written on the front is my name in a lovely cursive. When the envelope is open I pull out five sheets of paper.

One is written to my dad. It reads.

_Tristan, I'm starting to think you won't let her see any of the gifts I send her, and to that all I have to say is, grow up. She deserves to know who I am. She deserves to know that I care about her. Stop thinking about yourself and let our daughter know that I still think about her everyday. Please, be the adult here. she needs her mother in her life._

_G.L.A_

I stare at the paper for longer than I'd like, rereading the words over and over again. Why has he been keeping her from me?

The next three pages are for me.

_My Dear Daughter, Piper._

_It's another year, my darling. Another Christmas for you to hopefully find yourself enjoying. I'm sorry, yet again that I haven't been to see you. Your father and I can never agree on anything. Like we ever have before._

_Anyway, I've been meaning to send you pictures of your newest half sibling. His name is Seth, he was born last year on the twenty eighth. He reminds me of you in a way. Always so adventurous, just like you when you were a baby. I remember you would always somehow crawl away from me, and when you started walking! The first time I took you to the store they had to shut down the entire complex to find you._

_Your half sister's are doing well, Casey's started kindergarten this year and she made you a card that I've enclosed. Samantha is in the third grade now, but she also sent you a letter. From my understanding the assignment was a letter to someone you would really want to meet._

_Your step dad is doing well, not that I think you'd care much about him. I have a feeling you'd find him overbearing if he were a part of your life. That's beside the point._

_As always I want you to know that if you ever wish to get in contact with me I've left my address, home and cell numbers on a separate sheet of paper. I will always be here for you honey, I know you're fifteen years old and you've never contacted me before, but I want you to know that you always can._

_I love you my sweet little girl. I hope that you find some time to get into contact with me._

_Sending you all my love this year,_

_Your mother._

I can feel the makeup running down my face along with tears. I can just feeling it. I don't think anyone's noticed yet. So that's good.

I turn over the page to see an adorably mess drawing. I think it's supposed to be Santa standing by a plate of cookies. But it may also be a reindeer eating a Christmas tree... The words read, _'To my biggerest bestliest sister.'_

I assume it's from the kindergartener.

The next page is a letter that has large, sloppy, but still readable hand writing, _If I could meet anyone in the whole wild world it would be my big sister. My mom says that she's really nice and fun and stuff. And I really want to meet her because she could braid my hair and tell me stories and eat food with me. I think she's pretty. Mom says she is. I hope she likes dogs. I like dogs. And I really hope she's a good person. Oh! And I hope she's like a real life Disney princess. I would really like to meet my big sister._

And now that I'm a complete mess I pull out a family picture. Three kids, two adults. I stare at the girls. Both of them blonde, the taller one is missing a tooth, the shorter one has her hair braided. The baby looks confused in the most darling way. Then there's the man, handsome, tall looking, his eyes shining a dark brown.

My gaze lingers on the woman her effortless smile, her long flowing blonde hair. Her eyes that appear to be transitioning from blue to green. Eyes that remind me of my own. My mom... She's my mom. That's what she looks like. The woman who gave me life almost sixteen years ago. And she's there. It's like she's smiling at me, and I can't do this. I can't handle it.

"I'm sorry." I say getting up and walking into my bedroom. How could my dad have kept this from me? How could he have kept this family away from me? I could have had a mom, and sisters, and a brother, and a dad who would embarrassingly come to anything I did growing up.

I wouldn't have to spend this Christmas alone. They could have come and spent it with me. Why on Earth would my dad have kept this away from me? Why would he do that?

"Pipes?" Annabeth asks reaching our room. I let out an ugly sob before I cover my mouth. She sits on my bed, holding me to her chest, "Shh, it's okay. It's okay." She tells me.

I clutch her tightly, coughing when I can't breathe. Soon, I notice Reyna, and Hazel walking over to me. Reyna starts cleaning my makeup off with tissues while Hazel holds my shoulders.

"What happened, dear?" Hazel asks. I shake my head. I can't vocalize how I feel. They wouldn't understand what it's like to know that you could have had a family. You could have and you're not sure why you weren't given the opportunity. Why did my dad take that from me? Is there a reason?

Does it really matter now? I'm grown up and I grew up without a mom. Without sisters. Without a brother. Does it really matter what could have been?

"Pipes?" I see the guys come into my room. I release one of my hands so I can hide my face from them.

"Pipes... What's the matter?" Nico asks.

I shake my head. I don't want to talk. I just want to sleep.

They stay there with me, at least, they stay there with me until I fall asleep.


End file.
